Love & Relationships

Good Ways To Work At Sex In Marriage

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Many intending couples and even couples don’t take time talking about their sexual

When a young couple begins their life together as husband and wife, they usually don’t spend too much time talking about their sexual knowledge or experience. Quite frankly, they typically take this aspect of their relationship for granted – and why not? They’re young, they’re in love and they’re married. Isn’t that the perfect recipe for passionate and fulfilling physical intimacy? Good Ways To Work At Sex In Marriage

Well, the reality is that many of the more common reasons for a lack of satisfaction in this area really have nothing to do with age, marital status or physical fitness. Just like any other aspect of the marriage union, physical intimacy can either be a functional part of the relationship or it can be a deeply meaningful form of expression. The difference lies in how much work a couple is willing to do. Remember that our sexuality is a gift from God. This is more than just a physical response we’re talking about here. Sexuality is part of God’s plan of creation. Our sexuality as husbands and wives has been wired-in by God. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, so embrace this gift!

Sexual pleasure within marriage is encouraged – and expected. If your times of physical intimacy with your spouse aren’t all you’d hoped they’d be, take the steps necessary to find out what’s not working for the two of you. No one is expecting you to have the “ultimate” sexual experience every time, but this is too important of a measure of your connectedness to ignore if there is a problem. Sex is for unity, procreation, and pleasure, so keep your priorities straight.

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Keep mutuality as the central force of your “sexuality.” We are expected to give ourselves to each other in marriage; this is a mutual command (it’s not for wives only!). Each passage in the New Testament that teaches about the husband-wife sexual relationship either begins or ends with a command for mutuality. Not only are husband and wife equal in God’s sight, but they have mutual rights and responsibilities.

Do all you can to resolve “body image” problems. You know the drill: a husband pays his wife a compliment (“You’re beautiful”) and she doesn’t believe him. That might seem like a modest response on her part, but it actually could be a hindrance to their physical intimacy over time. Each spouse needs to bring a healthy self-image into the bedroom, or your sex lives will suffer.

Conserve energy and this does not refer to using less electricity in the home! Sexual desire is a manifestation of our sex drive, so if that energy is being spent on building a new business, engaging in sports or any other worthwhile, but time and energy-consuming, activity, your sex life may suffer as a result. Save your strength – your spouse will thank you for it!

Clear out distractions. This is another “basic” requirement to be sure, but the breathless pace of modern life doesn’t always make this an easy principle to follow! Very few of us can “multi-task” that entire well, and the more you “have on your mind,” the less interested you’ll be in physical intimacy with your spouse. Ruthlessly eliminate stress and distractions in your home, and your sex life has a much better chance of improving.

Each spouse must assume responsibility for his or her own body and related sexual issues. It’s the only way for a couple to truly come together as one, building the kind of physical intimacy into their marriage that they each desire.

Sex was created by God for the enjoyment of a man and woman in marriage. It’s supposed to be fun – so enjoy it